I swear she didn't look like that last week.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Randomize
