he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
