Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I've blown a few things in my day
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize