break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize