i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Randomize
