And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Four minutes until I can fart!
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
