I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Randomize
