If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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