You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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