I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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