I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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