does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
please come you make the beer taste better
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I think I have vodka in my lungs
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
