I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
