This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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