walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
