The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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