Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
