gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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