when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Randomize
