My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Randomize