nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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