Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Randomize
