Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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