dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
