C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
