PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
