Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
