Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
