all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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