Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
