my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
