from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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