Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
