Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize