Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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