I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
He passed out mid-signature
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
