He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize