i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
