dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
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