He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
