i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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