Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Blood and glitter go together right?
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
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