went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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