Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
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