he puts the penis in happiness.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
No subtext here. People are naked.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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