Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
