I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
