Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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