I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
