"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
