You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Randomize
