As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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