The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Randomize